Looking Back on Reminiscing

Nostalgia is a funny thing. This morning, as I sat by the window in the house I'm staying in while its owners are away, the birds chirping in the bushes, the sun casting shadows of the trees by the sidewalk, and the occasional rush of a car passing, all reminded me of home. Living in an apartment in a city just isn't quite the same and while this suburban house still isn't as rural as where I grew up, it's much closer to it.

With this recognition of the similarities came a wave of nostalgia, and a little bit of homesickness. But then I realized it wasn't really homesickness--it was more like past-sickness. I was missing my childhood--sitting on the front porch of my babysitter's house, watching cars going by and making up stories about who was in them; climbing the tree in front of my house to read; sitting on the picnic table in my backyard with my dad to watch the sunset; playing basketball in the driveway with my brother. And I became sad. That life is not my life any more.

But then I got to thinking--when that was my life, I'm sure it wasn't as perfect as I remember it being. Even as a child, we have plenty of woes. And right now, in general, I have a lot of really great things going on. So what is it about us that makes us pine for the past? Usually, when I think about those years I think "Oh, things were so much simpler then." But why is that the only mark of happiness? I'm sure in 20 years when I'm paying a mortgage and my student loans and my kids are yelling at me, I'll be thinking the same thing about my life now. So why can't we recognize that and be just as attached, if not more so, to the present. I know it's an old, over-used cliche to say to "live in the moment," but usually that means not to worry so much about the future. I have more trouble relaxing my grip on the past, and while I want to retain all those great memories, I need to learn to appreciate all that I have now, which will become the memories I can't escape in the future. Rather than reliving everything the rest of our lives, how about we just live, and preserve if we can?